While in a relationship men tend to play certain roles that most at times, put their woman in line to the brink of emotional disorder, imbalance and mental collapse at worst. At times, it could just be attributed to chauvinism, pride, pear pressure, family influence or just self impounded. You are in a relationship; everything is in the open between you and your partner. There is nothing whatsoever that you can’t do or ask between the two of you. You are all human. There are deeper aspects of the relationship that you may need to ask about. However way you choose to go about them please do not do these to her:
Don’t Act Unfair to Her.
Your woman, whether wife, fiancée or girl friend is the person whom you have decided to hold at exclusive esteem. You chose her out of the whole crowd and that alone should bestow her with some degree of peculiarities and make her special. Always try to look at her in a positive light. Let her be the last person you would wish harm to come her way. Always treat her with kindness. Why would you want to be unfair to her?
Never judge her the same way you judge your other friends. She is special that’s why you chose her. If you are displeased about anything concerning her, deem it wiser to talk to her in a way she gets to know what you would have preferred be done than making a case out of it.
Noteworthy; some habits are hard to shake off and if your partner makes an effort to fight off that nagging one, a warm embrace would be a good way to appreciate her effort. This small gesture will steer her in tune.
Do Not Be Too Judgmental.
Do not make or form a habit of always acting in such ways that send negative signal to your partner or which would indicate you do not trust her. Even if you have reasons to, try to make her understand the reason you are acting the way you do rather than keeping her in the dark and making her die silently with your attitudes. No heart can be warmed when you keep blaming instead of taking responsibility for certain actions. You could be blaming her for something you initiated or even be maltreating her for something she does not have knowledge about. Always create room for fair-play and do not shut the door to proper communication between the two of you. Create a problem solving atmosphere in an open way that makes her feel mutual inclusion and see her wax stronger and better in that relationship journey. This way and manner, you guys would device smart ways of solving your problems and as such; resolving your differences will always determine whether it will result into a healthier relationship or not.
Do Not Confront Her in the Public
Anger! Bad temperament!! High emotional toxicity and volatility!!! All these are the offspring of heated confrontation between couples whether in the public or in the private. Two partners in a relationship cannot exhibit same kind of high temperament and succeed in creating a meaningful relationship and positive love affair from it. As you walk the path of love as one, chances are that, whatever irks you will make her angrier. An honest communication between the two of you cannot create a room for unnecessary altercations. Focus on what she says before you respond. Your response should be void of criticism, blame or irking demands. When the two of you are angry choose to be with the “steer” and see the agitation gradually end in a less angry tone. She will only calm down when you show that you understand why she is angry and you trying to sort it out.
Do Not Try to Change What You Don’t Understand
That you lack proper understanding of someone’s attitude, lifestyle and ways doesn’t make such act illegitimate, awkward or unacceptable. Any average woman has some degree of complexities but their simplicity is buried and hidden right within that seemingly complex cocoon. Trying to attack her attitude without making good effort to understand why such took place will be like treating an ailment without diagnosis. Try to maintain a balance between causes and effects. Never treat effects without digging deep down to the root cause if it must not repeat. Always try to understand what is bothering her first. Women’s attitude is synonymous to constant change and if you’ve not adapted to this, you can hardly keep or please a woman. They also, at times, fake up emotional dilemma and act sad, worried, disgusted, downcast, or even depressed (even accusing you of some fetish and virtual things you least thought of) just to know what your reactions would be. “Calculated calmness” is the best approach in times like this. Your actions, if not well coordinated, could actually make that which was meant to be faked up to become realistic. This is the normal ways of life for most enlightened and well educated and exposed women. Don’t always try to understand everything about them from the logical background else you may end up missing it all and they may really be prepared to argue you till the next day. Apply emotion, show sympathy and overlook; that’s the most trodden path to success.
Don’t be Silent on Difficult and Uncomfortable Things
Your partner is in the relationship because of what she believes in. What you believe in is an addition to her own self-worth and confidence in the relationship. Talk openly about your fears. She will feel involved and open up on the uncomfortable truths that initially you could not talk about. Doing this is more like fighting your own insecurities with the help of your partner. A long, stable, and lasting relationship depends on how you view your partner, how you relate to your partner, how you communicate with your partner and most vital is how you listen to your partner.
…To Be Cont’d