When you’re in a new relationship, everything about the person you are seeing would seem perfect.
Finally, you’ve found your “soul mate“; your shallow mind would quickly announce to you— someone whom you think meets all of your criteria for the perfect man or woman. But as the romantic bloom fades from the fore-mind, you realize that some of the criteria you mapped out as parameters for your perfect match haven’t been met. Recall: we are talking about two different genders of individuals from different backgrounds, of different personalities and different patterns of upbringings coming together to assume one mind and common objective in a romantic relationship. As a man you might have your own perception and mapped out plans about and for the relationship and she, as a lady would also have hers. Funny enough, the two would definitely have some conflicting ideas and perceptions but for them to stay together and work out modalities on how to make the relationship work, there has to be a common ground for agreement and which would also have due consideration and mutual inclusion of each other’s mindset, belief and independent opinion. This is called Compatibility plan. At a point you might discover that that your “perfect” partner has pulled a bit from those desirable qualities you’ve always had attraction for. You may even discover that all the wishing have led to a case of wanting everything and getting nothing. People who desire everything in a partner and set this to be their targets are most likely to end up in the wrong hand with little or none of such.
Logically, no two people are perfect match by nature. It’s absolutely normal for you to feel difficulty sometimes, especially when you find a number of big differences between you and your partner. But that does not mean you are not compatible with your partner necessarily. Relationship compatibility exists, first and foremost, when a couple relates with equality and respect. It’s important for couples to have fun together and really enjoy the time they spend together. Relationships thrive when two people share mutual companionship and activities; whereas bearing in mind that they must not always have to have every interest in common.
People often make this weird mistake of assuming there is always one person called “soul mate” out there for them and who will accept their “crude self” just the way it is and take all their “shit”. They also believe that such person will complement them in every way. The problem is they may use this idea to reject potential partners who don’t fit the image of the person they seem to be waiting for. Even when you find the ideal choice for you, that person will not share all of your interests or meet all of your needs.
Issues are bound to arise in any relationship; no one is perfect. However there are many potential partners you may be compatible with and with whom you could develop your ability to be a loving person.
The simple truth is just to bear in mind that there is no single person on the planet you will be compatible with in every way and every aspect. What you can look out for when hoping to find relationship compatibility is someone who is open to trying new things, to hearing feedback, to evolving themselves and who will have mutual and deserving respect for your opinion and feelings. If you look for just one person to meet all your needs, you’re setting yourself up for disaster. Shared beliefs can be valuable to achieving relationship compatibility, but separate interests are also to be expected. Couples should encourage each other to enjoy their interests and share them with others. They should also be open to engaging in each other’s interests and giving space for trying new things. You should always aim to show acts of love and tolerance in a way that a spectator would perceive as mutual, compassionate and mature. When it comes to relationship compatibility, it’s always so important to simply care for each other and also to consistently like, respect and support each other as autonomous individuals.
The first approach towards this is to define your choice and desired qualities for a relationship and also take a closer look at yourself, where you are, what your needs are, and what real compatibility ideology means to you. It was, however, on the ideology of compatibility that lovers derive that slogan “Mr. Right and/or Miss Right”.
To be cont’d…