Most breakups and their consequences which is heartbreak, experienced in most relationships of these days stem from partners who have harbored volatile and toxic friendship for quite a period of time and in which case one of them must have been suffering a big deal and dying in silence all the while.
Nursing a heart break is always an emotion-bullying and overwhelming event. While it may feel like the world as you have known it has ended, it does not mean that your entire future, life career, and journey to relationship and love life have been stunted to a standstill. While heartbreak does take time to overcome, you really, will feel like yourself again and be happy you did at the tail end of the whole effort if only you exercised caution and maturity in dealing with it. In the mean time, there are many things you can do to help mend your broken heart.
Always let out your emotion. It is perfectly natural to feel all sorts of emotional extremities after a breakup—from utter sadness to blinding anger. If you suddenly feel deep pains at any point in time, let it out—you will feel better after. However, it is important to remember not to let these emotional hypes dictate your lifestyle. If you feel sad, dive out of that emotion, let it out, and then move on. Trying to benumb yourself to the pain or holding your emotions inwards can effect prolonged aftermath of heartbreak —and can cause unnecessary levels of both internal and external stress. Crying can also help out. If you are fumed with the urge to cry, do not try to bottle it up because, crying has the power an ability to evacuate so many debris from the bin of the heart and create some free spaces for clear thinking and fresh feelings. However, there are certain times when crying might make a situation pretty uncomfortable and worse; e.g. crying when you are at work, in class, in church, in queue at the grocery store, etc. This kind of attention seeking approach towards handling heartbreak only ends up making you appear pitiable before people but will never solve your problem completely without leaving you with some lifetime scars.
Avoid Self Molestation And Negative Thought. Self accusation and blame are among the most negative approach while aiming at a quick recovery from heartbreak. The first and foremost thing to do after a breakup is to take proper time, stay in a very quiet environment, search your foremost and farthest mind and make a detailed reflection and recollection on the whole circumstances that led to the breakup. While carrying out this emotional research, desist from any form of sentiment and bias and be as rational and logical as possible. You can also confide in someone who is a mature mind and can be a worthy receptacle of your secret. If after these consultations you are convinced the fault is not yours then it is time to free yourself from the shackles. Do not sit at one corner and assume because it was someone you trusted so much, as in your “ex”, that has suddenly hurts you, then it would make you begin to question your self-worth or value. Do not let yourself go down this path–you are worth a whole lot. Remind yourself of your strength and things that you are good at or take pleasure in. Focus your positive energy into things that make you feel good about yourself. Go into media publication of love and relationship articles based on your experience thus far, go to gym, engage in good music that will take a whole lot of load off your shoulders, read great books on personal development and self rediscovery, go on a workout, change environment, take a holiday, etc. These things will help you to remember that though you have experienced emotional humiliation, you are strong enough to overcome the trauma. Make sure you do not engage in any act that will add more salt to your injury; be it self-inflicted or from a concerned third party.
It is also very important to always remember that there are many people who love you and many beautiful things to experience in the world. So rid yourself of negative thoughts, focus on things you love and surround yourself with excellent people and things that make you happy. Seeing a therapist or a psychologist for appropriate diagnosis and counseling can also be an excellent way to dispel negative thoughts. If you begin to feel yourself falling into a negative thought-space, divert your mind by doing something positively distracting and calming.
Be Yourself’s Best Friend for the Moment. Despite the fact that you might just feel like sleeping or staying indoors and soothing all day, you really do need to keep up your health state to minimum standard. A visit to a doctor to run some vital routine health checks would do a whole lot of good. Remember to eat and try to get a little exercise at least once in a week, and which will actually boosts your energy and blood circulation levels. This will, in turn make you feel more excited and happier. Also, in as much as this period is highly characterized with loss of appetite, try as much as possible to eat what you can manage and boost your incentive to eat by treating yourself to something you love at least once. Such things like ice cream, chocolate, fresh juice or nectar etc are really awesome in boosting appetite. Always work to improve your good mood and make yourself happier no matter however hard it might really be.
If your best treat is a cold beer, wine, or a fabulous cocktail or spirit, avoid getting drunk with it. Some persons really would think getting drunk a little might seem like the perfect antidote to easing off the mind for a while after a heart break. Be informed that feeling out of control is the last thing you need right now as when the artificial stimulation douses down the same feelings will come back and worse than ever. On top of that, getting drunk can lead to so many drunken tears and a bad hangover that will lay you lower than you already feel.
Beef-Up Your Happiness Again. While the person you thought loved you might be out of your life permanently, you have plenty of other people who would be at your beck and call and would be ready to drop everything to come give you some love. Plan a weekend together with your family after a breakup (that is if you stay away from them)–they will give you all the hugs and all the cheers you need. Schedule a girls or guys night out with your friends, go to the movies with your siblings and so on; the list of possibilities is endless. Let you relax, laugh, and feel the genuine love once again.
Having a broken heart can definitely lead to a feeling of just wanting to be alone. While it is definitely important to have your alone time to reflect and let your emotions out, you should also work to get out of the house at intervals to see people who can help you through what you are experiencing
Delete The Past Completely: Dwelling on the past would generally remain a chronic infection to you until you learn to perfectly incinerate it completely. This means you should keep yourself very far away from thinking or doing things that bring up your past relationship and make you feel bad, guilty or downcast. Create a list of things that remind you of your relationship and try your best to avoid them. For example, if stalking your “ex”’s social media pages probably make you feel shitty; put it on the barred list. Also avoid checking up at pictures of you and your “ex”, visiting some spots that were peculiar to your relationship, casting you mind and focusing your mental camera on memories of the past, especially of romantic/erotic times, etc.