You are in a relationship, but you are not at all on the same wavelength. You spend your time wrestling with your partner,
wanting to break up smoothly or just being constantly jealous. Because infidelity is not the only cause of separation,
you are listed, herewith, some 12 habits and attitudes more hurtful than a deception.
Lying to preserve your relationship
Couples fund of Lying and hiding things to each other are most bound to suffer strife later on.
Even if you make this decision for good, know that this is really a good idea just temporarily. Initially, it is a simple lie, but gradually you get lost in your stories and you get trapped.
The secret of a couple that would lasts is precisely communication. If you hide something from him/her, then you know that you did wrong in the first place.
Faking up reality about yourself
Couples that lead fake lives to each other may not really last long in the relationship.
For instance, he is a fan of football, so you pretend to know all the rules and you add that you miss no match. As a result, he falls in love, starts a relationship with you and realizes you’re a liar. By then you are the opposite of each other: he looks at the football and you, you watch the figure skating.
Or other more robust lies like that about background, lifestyle, job, past relationships, income, etc can just be tantamount to breakup when it casts.
When you do not listen to each other
A situation where either or both the couples have formed the habits of independent opinion and not listening to each other could be a whole lot of bad feelings. You may be a modest conservative and not like to reveal yourself, but your partner does not hear it that way. He/she needs to know that you care about him/her and also respect his/her opinion; that you feel good with him/her. The absence of words or listening ears can just cause problems in your relationship.
Feelings of resentment.
This happens at the point where the relationship has totally lost its savour, confidence and the emotional attachment to forge ahead. Most relationships don’t survive this because everything, at this point becomes irritating. If you feel that way, it’s because damage has already been done. Either you make the decision to go ahead, or you quit to avoid suffering both.
Low or no communication
You make love, you eat together, and that’s all. No other special kind of bond and attachment to keep the two of you together in more close familiarity. You do not talk anymore on vital issues or discuss confidential matters about yourselves…you prefer to confide more in someone else, you no longer say “I love you” and you do not do any more show of love and all that. Sometimes he/she annoys you, he/she says or does something that you misunderstand and instead of quietly asking for more clarification, you flare up. However, as you do not dialogue, you dig your separation and you approach slowly (but surely) the breakup.
Excessive show of Jealousy
Jealousy in small doses is entirely normal. Who has never been jealous seeing his guy ogle the beautiful kid next door? On the other hand, as soon as it becomes permanent and excessive it becomes irritating and harsh and you must question yourself. The other partner might begin to feel not being trustworthy or trusted as a result of the other’s feelings for infidelity and insecurity simply personified as jealousy. By presuming and making films and creating scenes, you end up forgetting your own love story.
To argue over nothing
You do not know why, but as soon as he/she opens his/her mouth, he/she annoys you. You take any pretext to start an argument and leave by slamming the door.
If you cannot live two minutes side by side without bickering, it’s probably that you have nothing to do together as committed lovers.
Trying to dominate the other
Why want to be above your partner? As a man, you are, by default, the head of the union. Why then do you still want to go the extra to show that authoritative might, quarreling and using commanding statements all the time instead of simply and quietly relaying your opinion? As a woman, your spouse is quiet and a perfect gentle man; why do you still want to go ahead to take advantage of his docility? Sometimes unwittingly you do a little too much as humans- understandably- but dwelling on it make the whole thing a mess. It’s your differences that bring you closer and teach you things you lack. To love is to treat the other as equals.
To manipulate a person so that it goes in your direction returns to make a cross on your relation. If you value someone, you must respect his opinion.
Do not accept compromises
You have the right to have character, but you must understand that your partner is not obliged to have the same desires as you. Without realizing it, you hurt the person who loves you and take him/her away from you. Any relationship that would last must have the couples always ready and willing to adjust, change, compromise and try new things. Excessive rigidity can be so damaging. Sometimes you have to compromise to move forward.
Staying in a relationship for the wrong reasons
…Stay by duty
You have been in a relationship for years and your families are used to seeing you together for such long. Unfortunately, your feelings are not the same today and you do not know how to breakup gently and move on…you then reluctantly accept to continue against your inner wish to draw the curtain. This is where resentment plays big roles.
Staying because of selfish benefits.
You are not just in love with him/her, but the idea of being in a relationship makes and creates a whole lot of sense of feelings. You cannot break because you have the impression of existing through him/her and the eyes of others. For the fact that you derive some material or intellectual benefits from someone you don’t love is not enough reason to seal a love union especially marriage. Gradually, it is you who will suffer from the situation in the long run when it all fades.